Unnecessary Bracing: What is Preparatory Suffering?

Preparatory suffering is the habit driven by the belief that if I imagine every possible thing that could go wrong—if I rehearse the loss, the rejection, the disappointment, the catastrophe in vivid detail—then I won’t be blindsided when it happens. I’ll be ready. I’ll be less hurt. It sounds logical. It even sounds adaptive. Trauma taught many of us that danger comes without warning, that safety is fragile, that homeostasis can be revoked without notice. Of course our nervous systems want a head start.